Friday, September 4, 2009

A note about class notes . . . .

My periodic e-mails elicit responses from time to time, some of which suggest that classmates who have not written books, made movies, launched companies or been appointed by presidents sometimes feel like they have nothing of note to share. Although it is true that I tend to highlight public successes -- often because I read about it on the internet -- I do not believe that this is the only worthy news of our class. Quite the opposite. The every day accomplishments of our classmates -- be they birth of a child, the graduation of a child from school, finding the time to get together with old friends, the celebration of a hobby or a cool trip, fighting for a cause -- are every bit as deserving of coverage on our class site as our more common fair. I am reminded of how true this is every Fall.

Ten years ago, my little brother, Luke, died suddenly. Luke was not a fancy guy. He tended bar, managed restaurants and, in the summer before he died, was a white water rafting guide in Wyoming. He never graduated from college and sometimes looked like Grizzly Adams. Yet, he had a huge impact on people because of his kind and generous spirit, and his adventurous way through life.

The first Saturday after Labor Day, we get together with his friends to have a charity golf event so we can send kids to the summer camp Luke attended. We thought initially that we would do the tournament for a year or two. After all, what had he done that would bring people together year after year? Ten years later, we are planning another tournament, and will get together with 100 or so people who will travel from all over the country to be there. At the end of our day together, this group will lift their glasses and remember their old friend. More than a couple of the kids who will be there are named after Luke. A fitting tribute to a wonderful life, that was completely devoid of the sorts of accomplishments I often report.

Luke's life is a steady and humbling reminder to me about how important the little things are, and how rich a life can be even without accolades. I have every confidence that the lives of our classmates -- whether heralded or not -- are just as full of wonder as Luke's was.

So, if you'd like to share the events of your life, even if they don't involve something fancy, I for one will look forward to reading about it.

4 comments:

Lisa Bradner said...

Tim, I'm very late to this and very behind on the class blog but this is a beautiful tribute to your brother and a reminder to all of us, most of whom are hopelessly goal and acheivement oriented, that how you live your life and the joy you leave behind matter more than the letters after your name or the zeros in your bank account.

Good luck with the golf outing and thanks for bothering to share.

Lisa

Lisa Bradner said...

Tim, I'm very late to this and very behind on the class blog but this is a beautiful tribute to your brother and a reminder to all of us, most of whom are hopelessly goal and acheivement oriented, that how you live your life and the joy you leave behind matter more than the letters after your name or the zeros in your bank account.

Good luck with the golf outing and thanks for bothering to share.

Lisa

Chris Cole said...

Tim

My brother died this summer after a long bout with cancer. He sounds much like yours. He was a horseman, bon-vivant, and proud dad. Not a fancy guy by any means, and caused me more than enough trouble over the years. But I miss him, more than I even thought I would.

Here is what I told my three boys at the service --
Brothers will fight with each other. My brother and I fought as much, maybe more than many brothers. That is part of brotherhood. We fought out of competition, and just plain boy energy – which is an unstoppable force, as any parent of boys knows. My brother and I fought out of love.
Lest you think it was all about fighting, I knew one thing. My brother always had my back, and I had his. We could kill each other behind closed doors, but when it came to everyone else, we were brothers in arms. He defended me many times. He helped me resolve disputes with my parents, acting as the mediator and diplomat on many occasions. And, I have been surprised to learn through his girlfriend that he actually boasted about me (which is of course, something one brother would never admit to another in front of his face). But to my boys, the lesson is this – Love your brothers. Defend them. Help them. You will never know love like a brother’s love, even if you may not always appreciate how it is shown.

David J. Pollay said...

Tim,

Thanks for sharing Luke's story. The annual get-together is awesome.

You're a good man.

David

p.s. Chris C., thanks for sharing your brother's story too.